🐢 Teenage Mutant Nazi Turtles
Peter Rothpletz on the GOP's latest racist group chat scandal, Trump demolishing the White House, Fox comparing Portland to Gaza, and the latest in Sudan.
🪐 On this day in 1956, the late, great Carrie Fisher was born; she was an outlandish, outspoken critic of authoritarianism, whether it reared its ugly head here in America or in a Galaxy Far, Far Away.
Good morning! Peter Rothpletz here. I was up until 4 am drafting my first ‘First Draft’! I’m writing to you from the infamous antifa stronghold of Manhattan, New York. I’ve hunkered down here for nearly five years, and I still haven’t managed to track down a single, doggone rebel militia. WHERE ARE THEY??? Asking for a friend…
In today’s ‘First Draft,’ President Donald Trump’s nominee to lead the Office of Special Counsel declares he has a “Nazi streak,” the White House receives one hell of a botched facelift, and Fox’s Jesse Waters compares Portland to… Gaza.
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‘I Do Have a Nazi Streak’
Forget turtles, it’s fascists all the way down. Much to Vice President JD Vance’s chagrin, it wasn’t a ‘teenager’ who was responsible for the Republican Party’s most recent, racist group chat debacle. It was a 30-year-old man.
Late yesterday, Politico reported that President Donald Trump’s nominee to lead the Office of Special Counsel, Paul Ingrassia, confessed to a cluster of fellow Republicans that he felt the Martin Luther King Jr. holiday should be “tossed into the seventh circle of hell” and said he has “a Nazi streak.”
Unfortunately, there’s far, far more than that. Ingrassia used an Italian slur for Black people to declare, “No moulignon holidays … From kwanza [sic] to mlk jr day to black history month to Juneteenth… Every single one needs to be eviscerated.”
Sweet Jesus. I need everybody to start getting #Woke again ASAP. Yes, I know it went a bit far the first time… But wowza.
BRING BACK WOKE!
In a statement provided to Politico, a lawyer for Ingrassia, Edward Andrew Paltzik, asserted that it “looks like these texts could be manipulated or are being provided with material context omitted. However, arguendo, even if the texts are authentic, they clearly read as self-deprecating and satirical humor making fun of the fact that liberals outlandishly and routinely call MAGA supporters ‘Nazis.’”
Umm… OK!
Putting that… something… aside, it was merely a week ago that Politico reported how leaders of a Young Republican group chat referred to Black Americans as “watermelon people,” mused about putting their political opponents in gas chambers, and joked about raping their enemies.
Clearly, we are in the bad place.
But here’s what depresses me most: we are some 10 years into Trumpism. Young “conservatives” have no conception of conservatism outside of the MAGA movement. To them, “Reagan” and “Buckley” are mythic figures akin to the goddess Athena and Spiderman. They are utterly untethered to reasonable discourse, and the vice president is eager to seize upon that horrible reality. He seeks to keep them in that state. He works to suspend them in a perpetual, hateful adolescence.
He wants them to be Teenage Mutant Nazi Turtles.
🗞️ What You Need to Know
Epstein details revealed: Jeffrey Epstein accuser Virginia Giuffre’s posthumous book, Nobody’s Girl, has officially been released, revealing new details on the late sex offender and Prince Andrew.
Troops march on: A US appeals court allowed Trump to send the National Guard into Portland, Oregon.
Comey fights back: Attorneys for former FBI Director James Comey filed motions to dismiss his indictment, calling it a “vindictive and selective prosecution.”
Demolition derby: The White House has begun demolishing the East Wing to make room for Trump’s $250-million ballroom extension.
Mass layoffs: The US Department of the Interior plans “to abolish 2,050 positions,” including major cuts to the Bureau of Land Management, according to a court-ordered disclosure.
👑 Schrödinger’s Autocrat
The president of the United States ostensibly BOMBED the East Wing of the White House yesterday.
Over the weekend, the commander in chief posted multiple AI-generated videos with a crown atop his balding head.
Nevertheless, yesterday, the speaker of the House asserted Americans should never, ever DARE mock Donald Trump.
That is apparently verboten.
Back in January, I penned a piece for The Guardian arguing, “there is no world in which Joe Biden and [Kamala] Harris attending the inauguration makes basic strategic sense. Such a move would only serve to undermine trust in a Democratic party brand that’s already on life support. Either Donald Trump is a fascist or he isn’t. There is no such thing as Schrödinger’s autocrat.”
I stand by those words. Biden and Harris made a grave mistake in participating in the pomp and circumstance around the inauguration.
Now, Trump is not only flouting constitutional precedent left and right, he’s reveling in how easily he can circumvent Congress.
Both parties must reckon with the monster they’ve created.
🧠 Pop Quiz!
Who was the last president to make a major structural change to the White House?
🌏 Anywhere But America
🇸🇩 Residents of the Sudanese city of al-Fashir sought safety in underground bunkers to protect themselves from increased attacks by the Rapid Support Forces.
🇵🇸 🇮🇱 US officials told the New York Times they are worried that Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu may derail the ceasefire agreement. Vice President JD Vance is in Israel with other Trump administration officials in an effort to shore up the deal. At least 87 Palestinians have been killed in Israeli attacks since the ceasefire began, according to Gaza health authorities.
🇲🇬 Madagascar’s coup leader Colonel Michael Randrianirina has named Herintsalama Rajaonarivelo as the new prime minister, just days after the country’s President Andry Rajoelina was pushed out of office in a governmental overhaul.
🇸🇦 First Qatar, now Saudi Arabia? Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman is reportedly trying to persuade Trump to give him and his kingdom the kind of deal that Qatar got last month when the Trump administration pledged to treat any attack on the Gulf state as a threat to US “peace and security.”
🚨 Don’t Miss It!
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📊 Poll of the Day
Thoughts and prayers for Trump and the Republicans. As we enter week three of the government shutdown, after the Senate failed to pass a stopgap funding bill for the 11th time, most Americans place the blame on them, according to the latest polling from YouGov.
🧠 Trivia answer: Harry Truman in 1952
Fox Watch
“Portland looks like Gaza.” Sorry, WTF? Jesse Watters should take a look at Fox’s own reporting on what Gaza actually looks like.
ICYMI From Zeteo
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Fantastic writing. Looking forward to the next read.
Great “First Draft”, Peter. You are joining a great team of journalists led by Mehdi. I’ve learned a lot and now keep up with political news via Zeteo. 👍